This is a compilation of some of my memories and experiences that happened during my teenage years. Start at the begginning of this blog to hear the beginning of my story.

The most recent posts will now be my experiences with Lupus as an adult and mother.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Elbow Pit

This one is a little out of order, because it happened at least a year after all the chemo had started.
After all the poking of needles my veins began to get weak. I was getting blood drawn sometimes once or twice a week, the usual though would be more like 2x a month. Once about 2 weeks after chemo and of course while I was in the hospital I would have it done once if not more.
Because of the abuse my veins were taking, not to mention the toxin running through them monthly they began to weaken and build up scar tissue.
For instance, I have (or had) awesome veins in my elbow pit. What is the elbow pit you may ask. haha. well Nate calls where your elbow bends and elbow pit, where you knee bend- knee pit, I guess the arm pit would technically be a shoulder pit? the first time I heard him call a knee pit a knee pit I about died laughing. What the? but now it is common vocabulary in our household.
ok now that it is explained, I HAD pretty awesome viens in my elbow pit. That was good, because I could get my arms switched off, and each arm has a couple good viens. so although they may still be poking in the same bruise- totally different vein. The would always look at my arms with great big sparkly eyes...so many choices! haha.
After a while the scar tissue builds up on the viens and it gets harder to get blood out, it makes it SO much more painful when they draw blood. The veins become weak-often collapsing and blowing up. Not fun, mainly cause they have to poke me all over again.
This happened all the time, it was not umcommon for me to have to get poked twice while trying to get blood drawn. OR or have 2-3 IV's during a chemo treatment. I became accustomed to it, I hated it, but it had to be done.
My arm would always be so sore too. the more treatments the more sore. After a while I used a brace. That would keep my arm from moving and moving the IV, and I would wrap my arm in warm towels or blankets. ahh. we all know how nice it is to pull out a fresh clean blanket out of the dryer and just snuggle- smelling the detergents. wouldn't that be nice to have those always at hand- "nurse, maid, butler, hot smelly blanket please" haha. Well although it was nice- they didnt smell that nice. more like a warewolf- if I Was a vampire that is.
ok so on with the experience. Like I said it is not uncommon for me to have 2-3+ IV's. sometimes it was that they would put one in my left hand, the vein would blow...they would go up a little past my wrist. blow or collapse, go a little further up. If that arm was done they would switch arms. You get the point. Sometimes though, I would have the IV in for a couple of hours and the nurse would come in and notice something was wrong with the fluid levels, check the IV and what do you know...it blew. so here we go again! It was really bad, I mean my dad, who is a Nurse Anesthetist and can do any IV because of profession, would always talk about putting in a more permanent one, like a PICC, so all they had to do is hook me up to that when I went down. (poor Jolyn, Krissy and Jenni, I remember complaining to you all the time about that...you probably remember, me showing off my bruises and whining...I'm so sorry!)
On this one occasion I was just arriving and they were getting the IV started. It seemed like it was starting late, because we had already seen and talked to the doctor. The nurse tried 3x to get an IV in. Keep in mind- the needle they use is "the BIGGEST one, so they can pump the fluid though you fast." I don't know what guage they actually used, but that is what the nurse told me word for word once. It was a male nurse too. why do I remember that?
Back to the story, The nurse tried about 3x. She called in another nurse on the floor who had a good rep at getting IV's. She tried twice, after the first one she said "If I don't get this one we are going to call in the IV team." There is an IV team? really? ok. 1/2 hour later the IV team finally arrived. They tried a few times to get it, no luck. By this time I was a mess. on the outside I was holding it together ok, just the type of crying where it is tears running down your cheeks- no sobbing like a child, although I wanted to- maybe throw in the three year old fit with it too. When they couldn't get it they called in life flight. LiFE FLighT? who knew. They did come in and got it on the first time, but they did it differently than the others- what they did is go into my elbow pit. They took a big hOnkin needle, said it was going to hurT and pushed down really hard and really deep, past the muscles into my deep vein. OOWWweeEIIEEe! Did you hit the bone? could have sworn I heard it crack.
so after about 7-8 IV attempts I was finally hooked up to be detoxified.
oh joy.


10 comments:

  1. Hey there! I'm in your ward right now... and gave a talk on Easter this past Sunday. Melisa told me you had this blog. Anyways, my mother-in-law (Adam's mom) has lupus as well. And she lived in the area for a while... so if you need suggestions on docs or whatever, let me know and I can ask her. Although I may not quite understand your pain, my heart goes out to you as I know it can be a hard journey!

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  2. My mouth is hanging wide open right now, I can't believe they had to do that to you! I am so sorry Des, your poor elbow pit! I do remember your horrible bruises and how huge and painful they looked. You honestly did not complain, at least not as much as I would have! I can't believe you held in your emotions so well, I would have been crying like a baby! You are seriously the bravest person I know, I love you!

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  3. Ooooh, I winced and cringed through this whole post. OWWWW doesn't even cover it!! Dang, I thought getting poked during labor was bad... no more complaining from me...
    love you Des!

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  4. Des-you did not complain, at least that I remember (and since Jo said the same thing and I know Jenni would say the same thing...we are right!) I cannot even imagine the pain you had to go through. I don't think I really understood everything in h.s. and I'm sorry for that. Now that I know all the medical terms and have had to poke people and get poked several times for one vein--I CANNOT imagine!! I love you!!!

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  5. They actually couldn't have gone into an artery... just a deep vein. Other wise the chemo would have killed your hand. (just the nurse in me coming out.) They should have just done a PICC line (Peripherally Inserted Central Catheter) and then it would have been semi permanent and you wouldn't have had to be tortured every time you went! Yuck!

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  6. ok aubs, I changed to the "Deep vein" I remember learning all those veins..like cephalic and stuff in anaotomy but that has left me- so thanks for the nurse in you.
    and as for the PICC, that is what I talked about with dad...up above. He always wanted to do it, we just never did and should have in retrospect... love ya!

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  7. Des, I just found this blog and have read it from the beginning. I remember Julie Call telling me in H.S. that you had Lupus, so I knew that but could never have known everything you went through. You are amazing. Thank you for sharing your story. You are a great strength and your testimony shines through. It made me sad to read your posts about the issues with image. I know all girls experience those insecurities. I'm sad that I probably never told you how beautiful you were. I always thought you were so pretty and your hair always looked really cute. You didn't seem chubby at all...I wish you could have known that. Anway, I'll continue to check your blog...thanks again for being brave and sharing these very personal experiences.
    Carrie (Buttars)

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  8. Have I commented on this blog before? I can't remember?
    I love to read this blog. Even though you went through such hard things, you make it seem so lighthearted and funny. That is why I love you!To be honest, I always used to forget in high school that you had Lupus, probably because I never really saw you sick. I am sorry if I wasnt more there for you when you were having hard times. Whenever I think about you, I always remember how much I just love you, you were so sweet and cute and funny AND I love to remember that you dated Bud! Hahahaha! I don't know why I find that sooo funny...I just do! :)
    Hopefully I see you again someday!
    Oh, and I didnt know your dad was a Nurse Anesthesist. That is what Dave is going to go to school for...and that makes me really excited because I hope I get to have a beautiful home like yours someday!!!

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  9. Des,
    I just read this entire blog!! I knew you had some kind of illness back in the day but I never thought it was serious (I hardly knew any of the facts)because every time I saw you, I thought to myself, she is so pretty and so smiley all the time! She must be doing alright. What an idiot I was!! Teenagers really are useless. Good thing we grow up! I'm so glad you're sharing this. You've always been a good example to me, but now that I know the details of your tremendous trial you have entered into 'hero' status. Seriously, you amaze me! (ps I never thought you were fat OR that you had thin hair, I've always thought you were gorgeous, and your smile always brightened my day, like Carrie, I wish I told you that back then)

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  10. Yikes! The entire reason I chose a homebirth was because of my HUGE fear and loathing of needles and IVs. Well, maybe not the entire reason, but a huge part of it. Nurses look at my veins and go, hmm... So I can only imagine how horrid it would have been. Are your veins permanently weakened, or is that something that will heal over time? You are amazing.

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